Mafe Maria: Personal stories by autism parent mentor, Maria Stultz

Week 36: The Countdown Begins

Bolliti Panfriti,

Next Sunday it will have been 37 weeks, and you should be fully baked. It’s time to start dropping bebé… I only need to do one last trip to the baby store to be completely ready for your arrival. Everything else is waiting for you.

This week, people’s comments about the hugeness, grossness, and ouchness of my belly are starting to affect me. For that reason, I will not upload any more belly photos to Flickr. Interestingly enough, a few days ago some guy made a dirty comment on my latest bare belly photo. He said something about my belly being delicious and him wanting to play with my belly button. Disgusted, I deleted the comment and blocked the guy. However, that weirdo with a pregnancy fetish may have been the only person with something nice to say about us, so it’s kind of funny how my perspective has changed.

I was perfectly happy and self–confident before, but now I am officially scared of labor.

I don’t want a c–section
I don’t want forceps
I don’t want cuts to my vagina
I don’t want urinary incontinence
I don’t want to agonize for 24 or more hours
I don’t want anything bad happen to you
I don’t want anything bad happen to me
I had a hard day yesterday and am officially scared.

I’m about to go and see my doctor. We’ll see what she reports…


  1. On , ksr wrote:

    Just block the blockheads and sickos both figuratively and literally.
    and don’t let them intrude with their negative energy. You have had such a beautiful ride until now..even with it’s little burps etc….and NOTHING can take this joyous experience away from you…..summon all your powers to garner the POSITIVE in all that is ahead….all of the the things you fear are in fact much less terrorizing than you imagine, and most likely things will go better than you expect….In the worst case, if you have 24+ hours of grueling labor and some less than desireable circumstances, I promise you that it is not permanent and holding that beautiful little boy in your arms will make it all pale in comparison… take heart and don’t let anyone spoil the last part of this 9 month journey for you. We think you look beeeeautiful!

  2. On , Maria wrote:

    Thank you Kim… I really needed encouraging and nice thoughts…

    At the time I wrote this I was feeling pretty crappy, but after returning from today’s appointment I feel better. Good things are happening:

    Baby’s already dropped. Good baby! He’s been so good to me all this time… So cooperative and adorable… He and Joey play already through the belly, and we told him this weekend that he needed to drop and come out so they could play more : )

    My doc says that I’m 1cm dilated and 75% effaced (or is it 25%? whatever it is, it probably is whatever means a little effaced, not almost all the way), which sounds very good to me. As long as things are happening, I’m very happy. I’ll just have to trust that I won’t be among the small percentage of cases with complications and scary things happening…

  3. On , Petie wrote:

    I knew you’d be early! It’s just me (and Joelle) who had to endure 2 weeks of extra pregnancy. Grrrr. I had joked with Nana that little Joaquin was going to come early and she’d be gone for Thanksgiving…. that just might happen. Since Joaquin may start the tradition, can we just plan on spending thanksgivings up there? Is the snow ready for skiing?

    In all seriousness, I do hope he comes early. I do think that’s a nice treat for mommies. Late is no fun. If he is late, just try to keep yourself busy and not worry too much. I went through a lot of your worst case scenarios AND I had a second baby. It’ll be ok. :)

  4. On , Maria wrote:

    I’m not sure that he’ll be early… I’d love that, but I asked my doctor if we had any indication to believe he could be born before 40 weeks. She tapped my legs with tenderness and said “It’s possible, but unlikely”, and smiled at me empathetically. What she did say is that things were getting set up for a speedy labor. That would be sweet! We’ll see what the progress is next week…

    Thanksgivings here would be awesome… Except you guys are the experts at cooking. Can I just turn my kitchen over to you, and just be a very good helper? : ) I do want Joaquin to come early, but don’t want to ruin this year’s feast for you all.

    Is the snow ready for skiing by Thanksgiving? Pilli???

  5. On , Joey wrote:

    Nope. Usually not enough snow here by T-Giving. Some slopes are opening this weekend, but we’ve hardly had any snow!!

  6. On , Petie wrote:

    Well, we just miss you guys for Thanksgiving! :( That’s been the hardest part about you guys moving up to SLC / Joey being in school. Once he’s out of school, we need to bring back the Thanksgiving tradition. Maybe it would be fun to swap Thanksgiving / spring break every year? We go up for one, you guys come down for one? Maybe it does make more sense to go there for spring break for skiing… I’m happy to do the lion’s share of thanksgiving feast cooking. As long as you would be ok turning over your kitchen!

    In any case, just know that I really, really miss you guys at Thanksgiving and will be again this year. Sniff.

  7. On , Maria wrote:

    I know… We miss Thanksgiving with you guys too!
    But next year we won’t be poor students anymore… So we should be able to travel again. Used to be easier just driving. Flying is worse around these Holidays, but how could we miss it?

  8. On , marla wrote:

    Hang in, Maria.

    I think this is the hardest part…being ready and waiting…

    There are quiet times in those moments that are precious too.

  9. On , Maria wrote:

    Some times it feels like Christ waiting for his passion. When I said this (with all the respect and perspective, of course), Joey quickly pointed out: “Yeah… except: He didn’t get the epidural”. So true!

  10. On , Ivan wrote:

    Ánimo prima, todo va a salir bien. Keep confident ! ;)

  11. On , Maria wrote:

    Gracias Ivanchi… Ahí vamos… Ahora la hartera es la espera, que desespera…