Bollo Campeche (i.e. I may have to stay at home forever)
This will have to be a short one. Gotta run and dry my hair so we can go out later to the aquarium, the next destination on Joaquin’s getting–out–of–the–house training series.
In a few words: Bolliti HATES the car seat. HATES the car. Tolerates motion in his new lightweight stroller, but HATES the stroller if the thing ain’t moving.
This all started when in baby’s first checkup out of the hospital, the pediatrician told us not to take the bollo out to shopping crowds for two to three months. So mom, Bolliti, and I have stayed in the house all that time, with the exception of a couple torturing strolls around the neighborhood, and a few highly planned trips of mom to shop, and me to do boring errands.
With the coming arrival of Joaquin’s fourth month, we dared to take the bollo out to Maggie Moo’s. We paid dearly, and quickly decided that this campeche bollo needed to be trained to get out of the house ASAP if we didn’t want to condemn me to an eternal stay at home.
Seeing that the newly alert bollo isn’t too happy about being carried in a sling, and because the fully–featured stroller I have at home is impossible for me to carry around, open, and close at the speed Bollo demands (not to mention he HATES the infant cradle), I went out and bought two lightweight strollers for Joaquin to road test. He cried and bubbled his heart out with the first one (the cheap one), and tolerated the second (more expensive, and luckily my favorite). We began the training by putting the bollo on the stroller and taking some laps around the house every day. Then, mom and I ventured the high seas and went out for a shopping trip with the bollo to IKEA.
Ahhhh, how he tricked me… He behaved beautifully at IKEA…
As it was to be expected, Bollo cried during half the car trip there, but somehow mom got him to calm down. At the store, when we attempted to transfer him from my warm arms to the stroller, he protested. So I let him stay with me and only attempted the transfer a few moments later, when he seemed more willing to tolerate the insult. While mom tried to shop for quilt covers, we were forced to entertain him constantly in order to keep him in the stroller. The situation was precarious, and sure thing, he quickly broke down and asked for teta… Not a problem: I was totally ready with my Hooter Hider and went straight to the cafe upstairs to nurse the bollo in public.
Bollo had a nice and calm feeding under the flowery design of my boob cover, and amazingly went straight to sleep without the need to burp, poop, or fuss. It was BEAUTIFUL!… I had a decaf coffee and a dessert, and read my small book about baby sleep while sweet bolliti took a pretty decent nap for that time of the day (i.e. usually he doesn’t sleep past 3pm). Then he woke up and was totally mesmerized by the lights. Got happily on the stroller and loved the trip around the textiles and lighting sections of the store. He gave my mom time to keep doubting her shopping choices, and it was really me who ended the trip, fearful that Joaquin would start crying any minute. He never did. Not at the store…
We got on the car and things went all smoothly until the car stopped at a light, and that’s when all hell broke loose. Bolliti’s eyes now produce tears, and man: There were many of those. They break your heart. In fact, this is one of the hardest things I have to report on mamahood… Driving a car while your sweet baby cries himself to death in a rear–facing seat on the back of the car. You hear him choking on his angry tears and can’t do anything about it but keep driving. I guess this confirms that I’m a terrible candidate to attempt the Ferber method.
However, back to the story, that cry was the only real low of the IKEA trip: I called it a rotund success, deserving of a next episode.
Yesterday we attempted another trip. This time, we’d go to Target (Cuchi needed to shop for something there), and we’d use the Starbucks at the neighboring Barnes & Noble as my nursing station. Again, Bolliti started crying halfway through the 10–minute car ride. We got to Barnes & Noble, and the bollo asked for teta pretty quickly (i.e. as soon as the stroller stopped moving and parked in front of our table). He had the teta furiously. The chairs were uncomfortable, so after the feeding I put him back on the stroller. With a feeding between “now” and the past agravio of the car ride, we thought it would be safe now to go to Target… Wrooooong… At Target, he didn’t take it more than 10 minutes. He was initially ok in the stroller until I made the unforgivable mistake of touching him and saying hi. Buahhhhhh!!!!!… It was the end of it. Time to head back home. He cried all the way to the house although mom reports that he had tiny glimpses of self–control.
As you may notice from the time stamp of this post, it’s night, and we didn’t go to the aquarium. I guess I chickened out of one more dramatic experience trying to get the bollo out.
Once more, I feel totally unprepared for this drama. Along with the secret of the “colostrum to breast milk” hell night, I’m afraid parents kept this one from me too. Or am I alone here? Is my baby the only one who hates riding a car, riding a stroller, being carried in a sling, and just plain: leaving home?
Discussing the issue with Joey, I comment that this is unsustainable… I can’t plan to begin every single tiny errand with a feeding as soon as we reach our destination (grocery store, bank, craft shop, mall, etc). This bollo HAS TO get used to leaving home and riding a car!… Joey asks me where I need to go. I mention places like the grocery store… Because he is the one who buys groceries in our household, Papa Bear replies “You don’t need to go the grocery store. I can get you anything you need”.
Although it’s tempting (for the dramatic effect), I won’t end this post with those sad words. We all — even Papa Bear — understand that this cannot end with me and Joaquin staying at home forever… Does it get better?… Are we just expecting too much from a three–month old?… I just can’t imagine that my child is the only one who’s gone through this… TELL ME my child is not the only one who’s gone through this!!!…
