Still lots to learn from my mother
At this moment my mom is flying back to Colombia after a 47–day visit in our home. We kept busy and had tons of fun, as evidenced by the lack of updates to this web site since her arrival. My mom has a great sense of humor, cooks deliciously, and has a remarkable, not often seen, capacity to adapt to the people, culture and places where she goes. She helps me immensely, among other reasons, because I don’t have to fight her ego when she visits. I can be myself without feeling guilty or self–conscious about what I do in my home, with my husband, and with my son. She respects my ways and my decisions as a person, wife, and new mother, without intervening or criticizing me to prove her importance and experience.
Two days before leaving, we got on a conversation about existentialism and other related topics we used to talk about. I was surprised to notice that I have become a little more skeptical about certain things than I was before. At some point I felt like I was arguing about our different beliefs, and somehow something made me stop myself. The little chatter in my brain urged to make important and intelligent points was replaced by a question… I liked my mom’s answer to it…
So today my lesson is to finally give a try to meditation. I didn’t get why before, but today I think I understand: It’s about helping me better control my ego. The promise is that with a more docile ego I can live a happier life. I won’t feel the need to defend myself to death whenever I feel attacked, criticized, or invaded. I’ll drop several grudges I currently have. I’ll be lighter. I’ll worry less. I’ll flow better with life and people. Sounds like a good plan.
Today, mom is flying away from her babies. Naturally, she was sad to leave Joaquin. She told me that she was saying good bye to the person he is today, because next time she sees him, he will be a different Joaquin. I wish the distance was shorter, so my son and I could keep enjoying her, laughing with her, and learning from her.