Kiki asked for photos of my walk, and these words bubbled up. Breadcrumbs from stories that will not be told.
trust and let go
A poem to celebrate "rising from my ashes" in the middle of the 2020 pandemic thanks to the nurturing support of a special program and community.
Perfection is not required, is what I’ve lived and say to every mother of an autistic child. Yet, I thought I needed to be perfect to mentor others now. Always supporting my growth, the Wise Voice changed my lenses today. From fear I went to inspiration, just like in key Son-Rise days. So I may not be perfect, but I’m ready to begin. To learn. To teach. To co-create.
For the last 15 months I’ve ventured the path of fixing. Whatever was accomplished, I got lost, burned out, and finally collapsed. It took weeks in the dark and a slap by the system to remember and center around what I learned at the beginning of my journey. Here we go again…
Put against the grain of the world I fear. Criticism points to doubts I hold about myself, and it’s gotta be for me to claim my strength, to align with truth, to become my highest potential letting go of the belief that I am not enough.
The U.S. presidential election is giving me a rich opportunity for expansion as I attempt to see disagreement and uncertainty with grace, from a higher perspective.
This morning I was launched into something yet to be discovered. It involved a separation from a past identity, and an explicit intention to trust and allow the journey to take me where it’s headed.
This spring my food garden is teaching me one more layer of letting go. I’m trusting the balance of nature, and enjoying my foraging trips every lunch and breakfast.
Reflecting on the change manifested since I started the Home Reorg, and the change not yet recognized coming next to my life.
Letting myself to do my project instead of seeking to nurture Joaquin’s development brings up fear. But John Holt reminds me: “It’s okay; keep trusting”.
Last month I attended one of Anat Baniel’s Kids Beyond Limits workshops. I loved meeting and interacting personally with one of my favorite teachers, refreshing my mind with her knowledge, and considering the possibility of signing up for her professional training – for a very little while. As I considered the kind of help I […]
I knew that freeing my hair was going to pay off in self acceptance, growth, and discovery… I started this “project” almost three months ago inspired to act on acceptance, allowance, letting go of control and all those good things, using my naturally curly hair (blow dried straight for 25 years) as subject and material […]
I’m thinking about our upcoming trip back to the Autism Treatment Center of America for an Intensive week… Same “challenges” than last year: A long day in airports, planes, and roads with a child and luggage, away from our kitchen. A single day to get there before our program begins (and a lot of money […]
Recently, I let go of several crippling habits I’ve carried for a long time. I’m currently living: Not trying to save, change, or heal anybody (not even one in the autism spectrum) Without any need to accomplish anything Not seeking anybody’s approval (I haven’t been put to a big test recently, though) For the first […]
Understanding the force behind my choices—love or fear—allowed me to start breaking “the rules”, and that way get to the true core of our Son-Rise program.
Success, performance, achievement. The stuff for which I’ve worked most in the first 38 years of my life… Last year’s existing project to create a new passionate career… To become a successful artisan, a brand name, a recognized designer able to make a living out of my craft and joy, all surrounded by stress and […]
Seeing how Joaquin is constantly developing in unexpected ways, I’m finally coming to understand the whole notion that he is in fact developing in a way that is comfortable and natural for him. Whether as parents we think his development is slow, or “different” in a bad way… that’s just our judgement based on comparing […]
I’ve just received my rental car for the week. After placing my bag in the trunk and contemplating all the little ways how this cheap rental is not as nice as our family car, I pull out the map package I’ve printed earlier charting the route to the Option Institute. The number of steps is […]
Only three days after my mom left — and really just one day alone at home with Joaquin — I started to worry… How can I be new to this baby every day?… The question was twofold: How can I always be energetic to be there for my baby day after day?… and also, where […]
Life constantly teaches me that if I manage to hold one more second, one more day, one more small unit of time, something wonderful will happen. I'm always so close to it, even though I can't see it.